I was just taking a breather from my endless pile of homework by watching a few episodes of the first season of Once Upon a Time. For a moment I was able to live in a fairytale, but was struck by one line the main character, Emma, said to Snow White: if something doesn’t feel right it’s because it is generally wrong.
This wisdom felt like something I should have already understood in my life. However, sometimes as individuals with different thoughts and feelings, we can come to live certain lessons without actually being able to place a finger on what we are learning. For instance, the times when we take a bite of hot food, fight to swallow it, and repeat. We know that it hurts, but we do it again anyways. When we are in the centre of an issue we often get lost in it. It’s the cliché: blinded by love. However, from a distance, situations and relationships can look so much different, almost revolutionary.
I was just in a relationship that felt so right on the surface. We connected instantly and shared some pretty amazing moments. We went from playing golf to swing dance, painting his apartment to poetry festivals, and weekends in the wild to nights out on the town. As great as it was, I remained very guarded. Something about the beginning of our relationship didn’t feel quite right. When Brian and I met I was dating another man, at least I thought I was. Whenever we went out we were either a couple or just friends, but never both at the same time. However, Brian swept me off my feet and showed me that he wanted me. I never had the chance to figure out exactly where I was with this other man, nor end it on any understanding or clean note. Well, just as fast as Brian and I started, we ended.
After I heard this line: if something doesn’t feel right it’s because it is generally wrong, this whole situation became so clear, as did many others. Pay attention to how you are truly feeling and your intuition. Don’t lie to yourself. Instead, ask yourself, does this feel right to me? Not only in your relationships, but look at every facet of your life: your social life, your job, your career path, and even your hobbies. And I ask you (as I was asked in one of my writing classes), what do you know?
*Names have been changed in this article